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纠结…啊！烦躁，发狂，有病
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<div class="post-body" itemprop="articleBody"><p>昨天我就很纠结，今天仍然很纠结，归根结底是我自己的缘故，我很容易被其他人影响，要是我心中有个疑虑，其他人再稍微煽动，我的心就不平静了！那就烦躁了，躁动了，癫狂了！我做不到不在乎其他人的看法！这个属于啥子毛病哦？天哪！</p>
<p>其实事情是这个样子，最近有个兼职，一个二级考试培训，每找到一个人报名给钱，我就可以得到一定的报酬！当时想的是这个也跟容易嘛，而且还可以挣到不少的钱，但是我其实真的不好意思去推销，我连到处去贴海报的勇气恐怕都不足够，平时看起来也许我很啥子啥子，但是真正让我一个人去面对很多事，我真的不好意思！这就是我的毛病！言归正传，通过我昨天晚上去问朋友，我慢慢就觉得似乎这个东西并没有那么简单，似乎也许会很忙并且没有什么结果，我开始打退堂鼓了，晚上和何～～聊天的时候，她鼓励我去尝试一哈，我似乎又有那个动力了，我还是决定去试！（感谢何思雨，其实我这个人最需要的就是支持和鼓励，比其他啥子都重要，然而生活中我缺少的也正是这个！）时间又转到今天中午，我想叫欧同学帮我在他们班上宣传这个，然后她的几个问题给我一问，我顿时又在想，这个东西又不是我找的，要是以后真的出了问题，我怎么向朋友交代，她也说这个似乎很困难…哎，几句话我就又倒下了，再一次倒下了…这一次我不想再去做这个工作了！我完全没有了信心！我做不到不为外物所动。今天晚上，回来本来就很累，今天一直在上课上到晚上10点，又想了很多，最终还是放弃了，也许算是逃避…这个事就告一段落！</p>
<p>另外一件事则是源自学姐的评论，说我是感情上的问题啊。我当时反驳到。我身边女生都莫得几个，纳闷去耍朋友……又加上今天晚上听到何思雨小朋友和她男朋友复合了，（在这里要祝福他们哈！）加上开学这几天的所见，所闻…我又在爱情这个问题上想开了！</p>
<p>其实，寒假前的那一段爱情老实说对我还是影响比较大，因为一个很重要的原因，但是我选择不在这里说！走在大学里面看到的都是很多情侣，很多美女…更多的女生，我承认我内心不平静，但是又因为我最近是很坚定得想要把java学好，然后还有朋友的陪伴，其实爱情这个东西我一直压着。我承认我羡慕，我嫉妒，我内心空虚，寂寞。但是我外表肯定阳光，有活力，我想的是要很乐观的态度生活，我也是这样做的，虽然我真的很想有一个人时时刻刻都来鼓励我，关心我，陪我说话，等等…我肯定很想。鼓励是我的最好的精神药片。哎，爱情啊！看吧…等等再说吧，也许就是明天…</p>
<p>爱情这方面，我承认我很弱智，我很不得行…</p>
<p>我有些时候想得有点疯癫，说话肯定不怎么收敛，要是哪里得罪了大家，真的不好意思！我肯定不是有意的…</p>
<p>写在最后，有些时候我很想很想爱情，有的时候我又想要是再一次受伤怎么半，但是我真的在爱情上没有怎么努力过…我脑壳有病！</p>
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